Are you using your age as an excuse?
I turned 30 this week!
It was my birthday on Sunday, and I’ve been relishing the attention all week because of it.
Reaching the end of a decade of existence and starting the beginning of a new one does feel very existential.
I relate to the mixed feelings that crop up when the starting digit of their age clocks over to the next number - when you can no longer describe yourself as being ‘in your twenties’ (or thirties, forties, fifties, sixties, seventies or beyond!) …
I’m no longer in my twenties… Does that mean I can’t blame my age for moments when I say something immature or want to do something that could be perceived as irresponsible?
I’m no longer in my twenties… Does that mean that I can’t shop at Glassons anymore? Or eat cold, leftover hashbrowns with tomato sauce for dinner when I can’t be bothered cooking? Am I too old to listen to Olivia Rodrigo?
When people asked me if I felt any different this week, I just answered that I didn’t.
Birthdays are strange because they really are ‘just another day’ - but we also can’t avoid the expectations placed on us to act or look a certain way ‘for our age’ and confront the reality of getting older.
However, I felt more existential dread and despair turning 27/28 than I did this week turning 30.
This reduction in age-related anxiety could partially be because I have followed Gary Vee on Instagram since I became self-employed because I needed a hype person on my feed to remind me that your twenties are supposed to be for stuffing up, and you’re never too old to take a leap of faith like starting a business (worth a follow if you’re also in need of similar reminders like I was).
I’m quite happy to say goodbye to the chaos and instability of being in one’s twenties. I look forward to the self-assuredness and reflectiveness that can only come with life experience, that I witness in my clients and friends older than me.
We can’t ignore the elephant in the room - a big part of the fear of ageing is our fear of losing value in society.
Becoming older seemingly means becoming weaker, more fragile, less ‘cool’, less attractive and less capable. As we age, we slowly fade into the background of everyone else’s lives until we’re eventually invisible.
Although it’s ironic that men in their 70s get voted in as the best choice to lead countries like the USA, unless you’re in a position of power - your life experience, stories, wisdom and perspective aren’t given the same value as being wrinkle-less and being able to pull off wearing Crocs with an outfit to go out to lunch in (not just as a sensible footwear choice for gardening or walking along a rocky beach).
I am lucky and blessed to work with clients of many different ages. Because of that, I don’t view ageing as a negative experience. Something that I’m so grateful to provide through my work are skills that empower my clients through ageing, by helping them develop and maintain strength, agility, mobility and good nutrition habits.
When we look after our bodies and invest in taking care of them, ageing isn’t a negative thing at all, more often it’s our perceptions that make it so.
I know I’m only 30, and I hear some of you telling me to wait until the arthritis hits before I speak too soon - but I do think that it would benefit all of us to shift the way that we think about getting older to appreciate the amazing things that come with it as well.
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I’d love to hear from you…
What have been the best things you’ve noticed about the decade you currently are in, as opposed to the decade before that?
Are you using your age as an excuse not to pursue things and activities that you really want in life or that bring you joy? What would you need to do to let go of those beliefs?
