Think you know what to do to lose weight, but you can’t seem to do it?

I asked my followers on Instagram what they struggle with when it comes to fat loss, and one of the answers I got in response was along the lines of ‘knowing what to do, but feeling unable to actually do it’.

I can relate to this.

When I was in university studying nutrition, my eating habits were probably at their worst. It made no sense to me. I was studying this subject partly (okay, mostly) because I wanted to improve my own eating habits—yet here I was living off McFlurries, Up&Go’s, and pepperoni wheels.

It seemed like the more I learnt about nutrition and thought about trying to be ‘healthy’, some kind of inner goblin took over, Remi the Rat style, compelling me to eat delicious fatty and sugary treats instead.

It was very frustrating because I knew this went against my goals and against everything I’d been learning about. That little goblin was going HEE HEE HEE at the mere consideration that I should try and cut down on the shnacks, because that was never going to happen. 

I haven’t dieted (by that, I mean purposely trying to lose weight by changing my diet) in roughly 6 years, and I have no intention of ever doing so again, to be honest. But I do have experience with dieting.

The times in my life I’ve been ‘successful’ at dieting have been when the stakes were high enough that it would have cost me shame not to see the length of the diet out.

The first time was my attempt at the ‘Healthy Skin Diet’ as a teenager. My acne was so bad that it greatly affected my self-confidence, and the idea of healing my skin from the inside out seemed better than smothering it in lotions and potions that didn’t work. 

I stuck to the diet religiously for 8 weeks, became very skinny, and still had acne afterwards (I know, you can cry for me). It was a ridiculously strict protocol, but I saw it through because the potential for clear skin at the end of the rainbow was enough to keep an insecure teen motivated. 

Another time was when I competed in a bikini competition. I followed a slow and steady, flexible approach. I tracked my calories but allowed myself to incorporate foods I enjoyed. I had chocolate most days. I ate enough calories to feel satiated and energised, which made it easy to stay consistent.

This approach worked for me, and I was thrilled to get to the level of leanness I needed to be for the competition without feeling too awful. Making sure that I ate enough whilst remaining in an energy deficit ensured I was able to follow through up until my competition, but at the same time, if I didn’t have the push of getting onto stage in a sparkly bikini at the end of it, I’d probably have given up a lot sooner (note, this is NOT me encouraging anybody to take up bodybuilding).

This is similar to many of my clients who find that they need some big, scary deadline to push towards for weight loss, like an overseas holiday or a big event, like a wedding. Others find that some kind of painful blow to the ego, like a break-up, a blunt comment made towards them, or a health scare is what’s needed to catapult them into action.

When I used to work at gyms and we would discuss the topic of motivation with other trainers, the common opinion was that if people are struggling to change their habits, they ‘don’t want it badly enough’. The solution was to remind people about how unhappy they said they were in their current bodies, and they’re not going to be around as long as they’d like to if they carry on the way they are (sounds grim, right?). 

This kind of ‘slap in the face reality check’ approach does work for some people. If you have somebody insulting you every time you don’t do what you say you’ll do - you’re more likely to do the thing. Pain, after all, is the biggest motivator. 

But I see that approach as fear-mongering. Even if it does work temporarily, at some point, you’re going to leave your trainer (likely because you’re terrified of them), and then what are you going to do? You’ll be like a rebellious child and indulge in all of the things you’ve been missing out on and six months later be back at square one.

In my opinion, the most effective way to lose weight and keep it off is to gradually change your habits over time so that being active and eating healthy feels more like something you want to do rather than have to. 

I know I’m on a different page from a lot of you, but when I started exercising to get stronger instead of trying to look a certain way, I actually began to enjoy training. When I stopped counting calories and started paying attention to how my body felt after different meals, I gravitated to eating balanced meals most of the time anyway (I still eat chocolate most days). When I stopped trying to change my body, I finally became happy with how my body looked.

Finding the motivation to start anything is hard. Knowing what to do isn’t always enough, and sometimes, the more we think about it, the more likely we are to end up doing the opposite (brains are silly).

But if it’s important to you, I’d start by finding ways to dip your toe into making changes that feel good to you and aren’t going to overwhelm you.

That could be a small tweak here and there, or implementing practices that help you reconnect with and listen to your body a bit better. 

And get curious about what you’re hoping to gain from fat loss.

Maybe there’s a way to achieve that without needing to pay someone to weaponise your insecurities, just saying. (FYI I try my absolute hardest to NOT be that trainer).

I'd love to hear your stories or your thoughts if you have any, just reply to this email.

Otherwise, have a lovely weekend!

Bye for now,

Lx