How tapping into your authenticity can improve your wellbeing
A big part of my teens and early twenties I spent observing.
Studying - not just class material - but other people.
People who were popular, attractive, and always seemed to be having fun, with loads of people around them - what made them this way?
I noted the clothes they would wear, their jokes, what colour they were dying their hair, which backpack they used, where they’d sit in the classroom, and even the pace at which they walked.
I was like David Attenborough, viewing my peers like they were wild animals - kind of creepy to think of it that way - I guess it worked in my favour that I wasn’t an old man whispering a commentary to a pretend audience in an English accent at the same time.
I’d look for patterns - adding to a mental shopping list of how I intended to emerge from my chrysalis each summer holiday.
Whenever I noticed a new ‘thing’ that people were doing, it was like the red car theory each time.
You know, when you start noticing red cars on the road - suddenly it seems like everyone is driving a red car and you wonder if it’s just in your head or whether they really have increased in popularity.
Social media has taken the red car theory to the next level.
All you need to do is hover over a video of say - a cat - for more than 3 seconds, and then you start getting bombarded with cat videos (ok that’s not the worst thing in the world, I know).
Algorithms feed us more of whatever we give our attention so that we can ultimately give more attention to the algorithm.
What worries me is how this occurs in the wellness and fitness space.
Name a health concern you or someone you know currently has - any health concern! Pick a card! Is it PCOS? IBS? Menopause? Acne? Back pain? Insomnia? Is it plain old body dissatisfaction?
For whatever you are ‘struggling with’ there will be people out there who have used your vulnerability to create attention-grabbing content specifically targeting people like you.
Once they offer you their ‘one simple trick, I can’t believe I’m sharing this for free, doctors hate her!’ advice, suddenly it feels like you’re seeing similar tips and tricks everywhere.
The more desperate we are to solve a problem, the more susceptible we are to buy into any and every bit of advice we come across, and the more we’ll keep getting exposed to this kind of content.
It might seem like ‘all the experts are saying XYZ…’
But really - it’s like the red car theory once again.
You’ve just entered a wormhole where you’ve been targeted as having a specific desire, so you’re shown a million videos, images and ads that will offer solutions.
A lot of the time the advice that you think ‘all of the experts are saying’ is just advice that a handful of very loud, very opinionated people are putting out there because they know that controversy and bold statements earn engagement, book sales and podcast interviews,
And you keep getting shown it because the algorithm knows you’ll look at it.
I’m not saying that all tips are bad and you should ignore them,
But I would suggest asking yourself whether what you’re seeing is designed to grab your attention or follow a trend,
Or whether it’s advice that’s genuinely going to help you.
Sometimes being constantly reminded about all the things we ‘should’ be doing can overwhelm us so much that we end up doing nothing at all.
Have you ever found yourself in this situation?
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This week, I encourage you to ask yourself what your ‘red cars’ are - more specifically, the products or solutions that keep getting pushed in front of you that you probably don’t need.
What are the protocols you keep getting told you should do? The things you’re told that you need to buy? The problems you’re told that you have?
Is any of it worth taking seriously?
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When I learnt to stop observing what others were doing, mimicking, copying, chasing the next trend to follow… I was able to live more authentically, and my happiness increased as a result.
The same principle applies to wellness. When we stop trying to just copy what we see other people doing, we can make more informed choices based on what is right for us in that moment.