Creating habits that stick
Hello friends!
It’s been a very significant week for us here in New Zealand…
The results of the big election have finally been counted,
That’s right - NZ’s Bird of the Century has been decided. (You didn’t think I was talking about the prime minister, did you?)
If you haven’t already heard, the splendid Pūtekete has earned the prestigious title, winning by a landslide victory (potentially) due to the influence of John Oliver and his appearance on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon along with an extravagant campaign involving billboards and posters all around the world.
It’s been extremely entertaining (perhaps even emotional?) to witness unfold. I’m obsessed with this write up from Forest and Bird NZ:
Bird-related emotions aside, this week has actually been very interesting work-wise.
I’ve had multiple conversations with clients that have probed my brain and challenged me to think about practical advice beyond ‘here's a bunch of recipes you should try, you should also aim for 10,000 steps a day’.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that kind of advice… but I have a hunch that’s not really what the people NEED.
What’s more helpful than watching an influencer’s ‘what I eat in a day’ video is understanding why there’s often a mental block around making behaviour changes in the first place.
If we can tackle the mental block… we can then implement certain habits that make more sense.
I’m going to use the example of one of my clients, Steve (hi Steve), as someone who I think has done a really great job at creating and then sticking to an exercise habit despite having multiple surgeries and struggling with major injuries of the last few years.
Steve is really consistent with his exercise. Since he’s come back to training post-surgery, he almost always gets 5 days a week of training in. 2 days a week of weight training, and at least 3 days a week of cardio on the bike.
What makes him so consistent?
In his words, he ‘gamifies’ his exercise habit.
He uses his Apple Watch to track his exercise
His Apple Watch was included as a part of his health insurance package.
The company he signed up with uses Apple Watches to incentivise people to exercise by offering them a cheaper annual fee if they are able to accumulate a certain amount of points (determined by how much exercise they track using their watches).
So, Steve is motivated to exercise because he is collecting points every time he does that allow him to maintain his health insurance package for less money.
I love it. Huge fan.
Now - you don’t necessarily need to copy Steve’s strategy in order to stick to your own habits…
But there are certainly other ways you could try ‘gamifying’ the habits which you are wanting to set.
How could you do this?
By implementing 2 strategies.
Create a points system. You could have a wall chart, or use a calendar to tick off days where you do ‘the thing’ that you’re wanting to do.
Create a reward specifically for when you reach a certain amount of points you said you’d do.
Don’t just cheat and get yourself that reward because you’re an adult now and you can buy your own treats whenever you want something. Think of something very specific that you probably wouldn’t treat yourself to on an average day, but you’d still really like to have. Like you’re buying a present for yourself.
Then you will associate doing ‘the thing’ with getting to have something that makes you happy. You can do this in big ways or little ways.
E.g, I’m someone who is easily motivated by chocolate. If I’m not motivated to exercise, I will let myself buy a little chocolate bar on the way to the gym as a little treat for myself for being a big girl and doing my little workout even though I didn’t feel like it. It works so much better than just telling myself ‘I haven’t even stepped outside today, I reeeeeally should go to the gym…..’
You already know that doesn’t work for you either.
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I think that too often we don’t celebrate, or even acknowledge our own successes, unless we think that other people would find them impressive. And even then, many of us would almost consider it distasteful to ‘toot your own horn’.
In my opinion, I think that ‘tooting your own horn’ is the best way to keep momentum going when it comes to taking action steps. I’m an enneagram 9 (i.e. a big softie) so I easily become frozen in ‘inaction’ when I’m flustered or stressed out. Like, I just shut down.
The only thing that’s helped me take action steps from being in a pit of sloth is positive reinforcement. I’m not ashamed of admitting I have regularly ‘tooted my own horn’ to people over the most average sounding accomplishments just because I wanted to hear back ‘hey that’s pretty good!’, even if they don’t really believe that.
Praise from other people fuels me. Harsh criticism just makes me cry and want to crawl into a hole. SURELY it’s not just me.
So. Celebrate your wins. Toot your own horn. Talk about stuff you’re proud of with other people, big or small, and don’t be afraid to treat yo’ self for doing the things you said you’d do.
Speaking of strategies though..
One of my other clients also mentioned another strategy she had learned about, of wearing ‘annoying’ jingle-y bracelets that you have to keep on until you complete the ‘said’ habit you were meant to do that day. The annoying-ness of having to wear the jewellery is often more annoying than just doing the damn thing you told yourself you’d do.
Interesting to think about! I like that one as well.
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I’m very interested in starting more conversations around habits. Feel free to reply - have you successfully implemented any habits in the past that you still do currently? What’s worked for you?
Take care,
L x
